Far Right Off To A Flying Stop!

Crivvens, Jings and Help Ma Boab! We’re only a couple of days into the new year and already the far right are in a tizz! Whit’s Going On?

Well, the new year started off with the successful conviction of Gary Dobson and David Norris over the racist murder of Stephen Lawrence – something which has sent the far right into an apoplectic spittle flying frenzy claiming it was all a fit-up. Some of the more sanguine racists have simply blamed ‘the Jews.’ Whilst we can only hope that Stephen Lawrence’s parents have finally got some kind of closure the same cannot be said for the parents of Anuj Bidve who was shot dead on Boxing Day morning in Salford. The eejit who allegedly pulled the trigger insisted his name was ‘Psycho’ at court and is probably looking forward to the next ten years inside. Well done. It is probably no coincidence that the BNP have been active in Salford recently under the far from deft organisation of Gary Tumulty, someone whose ineptitude our friends over at EDL News have already reported on:


For those readers with stronger stomachs, Lancaster Unity bravely published a picture of Tumulty baring his generous English backside for all to see. Look if ye dare!


A real vote catcher I’m sure!

Go West!

The far right have been busy inflating the victim balloons, criticising the politically correct 2 tier legal system and have been trying to establish a link between the ‘innocent’ Dobbin and Norris and Croydon charmer Emma West. West, for those still recuperating from too many sherries and mince pies, is also known as the ‘Tram Lady’ who was nicked for racially abusing fellow passengers on a tram and remanded in custody over Christmas. Britain First called for all far right groups to turn up in solidarity with them at the court hearing on the 3rd January – although the far right uniting is as likely as Nick Griffin submitting the BNP accounts on time – if at all. However the lawyers for Ms. West appealed to Britain First and the BNP (who were trying to piggy back the campaign) to not turn up as it would significantly taint the case if a bunch of hairy arsed baboons stood outside with union jacks and bottles of White Lightening cider. The almost insignificant Britain First are connected to the National People’s Party and have ex-BNP members Paul Golding and Andy McBride as key members as well as exBNP fundraiser ‘Diamond’ Jim Dowson. Andy McBride is a far from popular exBNP member who carries the whiff of the political graveyard about him. So, well done Britain First for organising a protest for someone who wants nothing to do with you. In future can we suggest that Goldbricker and McBride of Frankenstein first check to see if they’re welcome before announcing a ‘national demo’ that will ‘unite’ racists everywhere?

Britain First/NPP are only one of many splinter factions on the far-right. At the last count we had the BNP proper (Griffclops faction); BNP Reform headed by Andrew Brons who is busy building a ‘parallel party’ (which will no doubt descend into a horizontal party); the English Democrats (who include ex-BNPers Nick Cass and Chris Beverley who were unceremoniously ‘resigned’ from the Griffin clique); the fluffy fascist British Freedom, run by Simon ‘plug puller’ Bennett and other exBNP who are now in cahoots with the English Defence League; and finally the increasingly moribund National Front who are flirting with the Infidels ex-EDL splinter faction as they are desperate for attention. Crivvens! They all have a tendency to stand in the same ward and thus split the tiny amount of far right votes available then later call for ‘unity’ which never happens because they all want to be Siegfried and no one wants to be Roy.

Tommy’s Tantrums & Other Tales!

As for the EDL, well they haven’t got off to the best of starts. At Christmas, Mr Tommy alleged he had been assaulted by ‘Muslims’ but it is now widely rumoured that he had been battered by one of the Luton soccer team followers, Men In Gear, and had faked the extent of his injuries with some canny make-up. Apparently, Claire’s Accessories are now marketing an eye-shadow called ‘Yaxley-Blue.’ The whole incident is seen by most as made-up like the assassination story that Kocaine Kev Karol was trying to flog to newspapers for some Gak tokens last year. Mr Tommy said that he did not report it to plod but instead went straight to The Sun to sell the story. However his supporters, perhaps not getting this, urged him towards  plod’s tender caresses which he then had to do and made-up a load of old cobblers about the incident. Funnily enough these kind of things usually happen to Tommy when the number of likes on Facebook are falling dramatically or there is a demo in the offing. After being hacked so many times, the EDL Facebook likes are now down to a fraction of what they once were. They have also stopped charging for access to their increasingly deserted forum as no one was prepared to ‘pony up the folding’ seeing it as a piss-take too far!

The main reasons folk have moved away from the EDL are: the demos have been a waste of time and plod have had them cornered; that Mr Tommy and Uncle Kev have been coining it off the Hoody proceeds; and that when the ‘foot and mouth soldiers’ get nicked they’re left  to sort it out on their own whilst Mr Tommy gets a Free Mr Tommy campaign and loads of ‘legal aid.’ And this is a significant problem as plod have shown they are prepared to go heavy on the EDL and friends. In the last week or two the Blackburn mob of Infidels were all nicked for being cockends, some mug from Telford was fined nearly 700 quid for being daft in the presence of plod on a demo, Humberside plod are on the scout for 2 likely lads suspected of general beastliness, and the ever-fragrant Hayley Wells was up in court on charges over attacking a Plymouth kebab shop which doesn’t look good. She has already been told off by Ma Wells for going out on the piss instead of looking after the bairns. Ms. Hayley, who recently broke up with Combined exForces Mike Rafferty, is now pregnant by an unknown source.

Combined ExFarcicals

The Combined ExForces (CxF) are not overburdened with intelligence and it was because of their posturing about ‘snipers’ on Facebook and attacking Occupy at St Paul’s that the EDL all got nicked on Remembrance Day last year. After that there was a big fall out with toy guns scattered around their armour plated prams as Rafferty sacked the 2nd in command and the 2nd in command sacked Rafferty. Then Lyn Saddington started sticking her neb in and it’s a total shuttle crash. The Combined ExForces have been trumpeting that they are a paramilitary outfit and recently announced a meeting in Manchester hoping that plod won’t know about it. Eejits!

The Infidels faction based in the North-West and North-East are led by Snowy ‘Crack Pipe’ Shaw who called for a demo at Mr Tommy’s mum’s house on the same day as the next EDL national demo. This caused ructions aplenty and ‘Crack Pipe’ (Llama farmer for Tara Palmer) later changed his mind and said it was ‘a piss-take’ – which it clearly wasn’t. The call for a do at Chez Tommy attracted a lot of criticism as Mr Tommy’s mum is unwell and attacking houses with women and kids in is seen as poor form even by soccer hooligans! The Infidels are claiming that 2012 is going to be ‘their year’ which is highly doubtful. Mr Tommy certainly doesn’t think so and referred to the northern factions as ‘inbred Nazi bastards’ which isn’t very brotherly! So quite a lot of unhappiness in the ranks and the national demo that Mr Tommy has called on February 4th is going to show how much support he still has. He also released another one of his tedious video messages which just went on and on and on and… haven’t you heard of editing Mr Tommy? Or a script? The gist of it is that a twitchy coked up Mr Tommy said that he is okay after the ‘attack,’ that Muslims are very bad indeed and it is okay to hit them and if any of the Infidels want to come and have it, they know where he lives. Sadly, most of the Infidels can’t even afford the Megabus to Luton and spend all their benefits on Stella and Charlie. Oh well!

So a  week into 2012 and already the far right are in a mess. Happy new year!


About malatesta32

Malatesta aka M. Testa, undercover anti-fascist blogger, has analyzed the changing fortunes of the British far right for nearly a decade. He has given lectures on anti-fascism, published articles in Anarchist Studies and Freedom magazine and wrote Militant Anti-Fascism: 100 Years Of Resistance (AK Press 2015) which the Morning Star called a '‘Potent Primer On Europe’s Anti-Fascist Struggle … a useful source of information about the fight against fascism.’ http://www.akuk.com/index.php?_a=product&product_id=7285
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One Response to Far Right Off To A Flying Stop!

  1. gulrotkake says:

    gulrotkake i langpanne Hrm, Not the best post unfortunately. Sorry to be so blunt! You should try some Norwegian carrot cake ( gulrotkake langpanne ) to cheer you up instead.

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