The EU was left reeling again today after Toytown voted to leave the single market, drop the Euro, and go back to acorns as currency. Local taxi-driver, Noddy Robinson of the PDL (Puppets Defence League) said: ‘It’s them fackin’ goblins innit! Theivin’ little bastards! You can’t leave anything out at night.’
Robinson: Local C***
Local goblins, Sly and Gobbo said ‘It’s unfair. We work hard! Anything goes missing, and we’re to blame. It’s just not on! By the way, do you wanna buy a nice red and yellow taxi, 1 careless owner?’
Goblins ‘at work!’
Like BREXITERS, the T-EXITERS are total fuck-bugling hotplates full of boiling asparagus piss who believe that ‘imaginary-grants’ are to blame for benefit cuts, NHS under-funding, and a chronic lack of public services. And because they are thick as sticky shit in a toilet bowl full of toffee, they don’t understand the results of vicious austerity policies imposed by the Tories in 2012 that are the worst attacks on the working class since Thatcher – who incidentally is secretly controlling Michael ‘Shagless’ Gove and his horrible wife from beyond the grave according to a very reliable source (i.e., the voices in my head). In a statement today Gove said ‘Although everyone thinks I look permanently surprised, I am not! And I am not surprised that I fucked Blowjob Johnson off in the least. And contrary to popular belief, my wife does not carry my testicles in her handbag, they are here in my fluffy little trouser pouch, would you like to see them children?’
GOVE: No Surprise that he’s a Total Shitbiscuit!
Boris Johnson later said ‘Ooh, lorks-a-mighty, deary me, and crikey-oh-trousers, it’s a positive pyramid of peroxide piffle, now do you mind awfully, it’s time for a hand shandy!’
Be Seeing You!